Play in the Work – Rest - Play Balance

In this series of posts, I’m laying out a framework for a lifestyle schedule. Not a work-life balance, because work is part of life. This is a work-rest-play balance that’s in a natural rhythm like the rhythm of the seasons or the cycle of the day.

This method starts with play. The standard has been to work, work, work and then if there’s any time left you can enjoy life. This is how the “work-life balance” concept came about but it’s incomplete. That’s why I’m calling for a new balance of work-rest-play.

Your sensitive nervous system is responsive to each component. Burnout and overwhelm happen when work, rest and play are not in balance. You’re likely more affected by it and also more likely to benefit from the balance.

We’re not doing it the standard way. Music classes, gym, recess and art have been taken out of school like it’s something we should just get used to for the rest of our lives, but we’re putting all of that back into our lives. It’s from play and free exploration that the inspiration and energy to work comes. It’s the fuel for the vehicle. Sputtering along on E isn’t going to get you very far. Plus, it’s stressful to be nearly out of gas and not know when the next refueling station is coming along.

Play is a voluntary, enjoyable activity for its own sake. There’s no goal. It’s characterized by creativity and exploration, along with a sense of fun. Play is spontaneous, enjoyable and engaging. Play is the opposite of a plan. If it feels loose and unexpected, I count it as play.

Of course, with a full life there may need be some planning to make room for play. Play is marked green on my calendar. I’ll block off a chunk of time with no plans in green. I’ll also mark a hike or a day at the beach as green on my calendar too. This is part of an intentional lifestyle balance to be sure there’s a lot of green on the calendar. Play also pops up when I take a break from writing to go play Frisbee with my dog in the backyard. And I’ve got a couple hours scheduled in on a weekday to play in the kitchen, baking bread or whipping up a new sauce for noodles that feels like fun and not a chore.

Are you giving yourself enough time for wide-eyed wonder, silliness and spontaneous activity? If you feel like you simply don’t have enough time, it’s doubly important. Because play feeds work. Wonder, joy and curiosity all light up the brain, while increasing creativity and literally raising your vibes. It can put you in the zone.

It also reduces stress. The higher cognitive functions of the brain are not given priority when the system is trying to fight or flee to stay alive. This is what the stress response is. Sitting at your desk for an hour under stress is less effective than going to have fun for 45 minutes and then getting to some clear, focused work for 15 minutes.

Play improves brain function and increases productivity. This contributes to the magic formula of: the less you work, the more you get done. Because, when you do get to work you’re inspired, energized and fresh. You’re riding the super-highway of clear action vs. struggling through the swamp of foggy overwhelm.

It also contributes to better physical health. This is a big one for me. I find it hard to exercise for the sake of exercise, but I love to swim, bike, hike and run around in the park with my dog. I can play and get many of the same benefits of formal exercise. Plus, laughter is great cardio.

Play is as important as good nutrition. It’s not a special bonus in life, it’s the bread and butter.

At this point you may be thinking, “Sounds great, Mira! But where do I find the time for play?” And here’s the secret. Play creates time for work. It can feel subversive to go against the dominant culture that tells you work is more important, but I dare you to try it and see for yourself.

You can play while you work.

You can also add play into your work to increase the balance of work-rest-play. You may not have 8 hours a day to play, but if your work is playful and fun, you get both!

Anything from sharing funny memes to jumping up to disco dance in the chunk of time between appointments. There’s no reason you can’t blow bubbles at your desk. You’ll still get benefit.

3 Steps To Add More Play:

Let go of the lie. There’s a voice that’s been installed in each of our heads that says we have to work to have value, to “get it all done” and to be a good person. There’s also an insidious message lingering in our subconscious that play is for children. We might feel silly or irresponsible playing Chinese jump rope with a neighbor in the driveway over the lunch hour. Notice the messages in your head when you make a choice to play. You have the power to change that story.

Re-connect with what lights you up. Roller skating? Jigsaw puzzles? Escape rooms? It’s sad but common to have lost touch with what’s fun. Like, squeal with delight fun. For me, that’s mini golf. It’s impossible to take it seriously, I love the creativity of each hole and it’s great to be outside. Start a list and keep adding to it. How many of these activities do you engage in on a weekly or even monthly basis? Grab your calendar and schedule them in now.

Get it on the calendar. Schedule it like an important meeting – because it is! This is the first thing to go on the calendar. In The Collective, the HSP Holistic group coaching program, we reset the calendar every season. And, we start by scheduling in some fun. A special night out, tickets to a concert, jump roping with a neighbor all gets put on the calendar. Yes, please dive into spontaneous play too, but if the calendar is full it’s much less likely to happen. This is a “pay yourself first” strategy.

It’s a strange world we’re living in that we need to make a case for play. But I’ve talked to many fascinating women who feel like there just isn’t space in life for play. This is why we start with play. We make sure to get it on the calendar before everything else fills it up.

If the problems of the world feel too serious to play, consider that you’ll be in a better position to help when you have this work – rest – play balance. You may even come up with a novel solution to a vexing problem while at play.

I’ll leave you with an image of the sky at the campsite where we were playing last week. We laughed and talked with friends (quietly) late into the night as we watched the Northern Lights and searched the sky for meteors while listening to two owls court each other in the trees overhead. My wonder and delight bucket was filled to overflowing when one swooped low overhead and its wings seemed to stretch across our whole campsite.

Next up, we’ll take a closer look at the two other components of this lifestyle balance formula: rest and work.

Journal Prompts:

What do I love to do? List 10 things. How often do I do it? How soon can I get something I love on my calendar? How many times a week can I do some of these things I love to do?

Who says I don’t get to play? How do I feel when I believe that’s true? What’s the opposite and how do I feel when that’s true?